Toxic Cloud Warning

A MOSY News exclusive

Southern Australia, 8 January 2017

Meteorologists are warning the public of a large testosterone cloud that has emerged in a small area of south-eastern Australia in recent weeks. They are unsure of the reasons for the development of the toxic plume but it is assumed to be caused by the cessation of normal activities in the area.

It is not known what health impacts are likely from exposure to the testosterone cloud but medical experts have issued a warning to anyone living in the area who is genetically female and carries the motherhood gene that there could be moderate to severe psychological effects. Such persons are advised to exit the area whenever possible to reduce exposure. Some relief from symptoms is possible through contact with other genetically female persons not affected by the cloud.

Non-residents are being advised to steer clear of the area.

While climate experts cannot yet fully account for the emergence of the cloud, analysis of historical data would suggest that this is not an entirely new phenomenon and there has been evidence of similar developments in the past. In these cases, the cloud has dissipated by early February which would indicate that the reduction in normal activities in the area is the probable cause of the toxic cloud.

Based on such evidence and despite the unusual size of the current development, it is hoped that this testosterone cloud will dissipate by mid-February. The Bureau of Meteorology advises that the cloud should hold no immediate danger to the wider community but that those living in the area should exercise caution at all times in the coming weeks.






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Peace In The House Of Testosterone

Peace. Blessed, blessed peace.

The kids are back at school, the husband is at work and the MOSY House of Testosterone is temporarily cleansed of its pervasive masculinity.

Well, except for the cat. But he’s neutered so doesn’t really count.

Testosterone actually has a physical, airborne presence. Did you know that?

That’s not science. That’s just me realising that I can actually breathe today. And hear the birds outside. And find room in my head for my own thoughts.

It’s almost shocking.

As has been previously well-established, I am not a girly girl but even my little oestrogen being can find it tough going against the storm cloud of ‘boyness’ that permeates my house.

Much like the smog you don’t notice when you live in the thick of it, a testosterone-filled house is just my daily reality that passes mostly without question. But the end of school holidays can be like a trip up the mountain to rediscover the fresh air and look back with amazement at the conditions I was living in for all those weeks.

Of course, it’s a fleeting escape. The testosterone horde will return this afternoon, their rampant maleness all the more dominant for the brief respite I will have enjoyed today.

In the meantime, I’ll take all the peace I can get.

A Mother's Peace



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