We have a Magic Kitchen Fairy.
It’s true.
She’s amazing.
For example:
If you spill something on the bench, you can just leave it and the Magic Kitchen Fairy will wipe it up.
If you pull the inner seal off a bottle of milk, just leave it on the bench. The Magic Kitchen Fairy will pop it in the bin for you. The same goes for empty packets and wrappers.
Dirty plate or cup? Just put it down wherever you’re sitting. The Magic Kitchen Fairy will be along soon to collect it for you.
Whenever you make a sandwich, don’t worry about the cutting board, knife and crumbs and stuff. The Magic Kitchen Fairy will clean that up for you.
Oops. Had an overflow in the microwave? Not a problem! Just go about your business and the Magic Kitchen Fairy will wash the tray and make that microwave sparkling clean again.
If you forget to put that box of cereal back in the pantry, not to worry. The Magic Kitchen Fairy put it away for you.
See? She’s amazing!
She hates me.
No, listen, she really hates me. I’ve tried doing those things and she never cleans things up for me.
And I swear when others leave a mess and I’m around, she hides and leaves me to do it.
She hates me.
You don’t think she exists, do you? But she does. I know.
How do I know she exists?
Because I know my husband and children definitely believe in the Magic Kitchen Fairy. They trust her completely to clean things up for them. Surely four people can’t be that badly mistaken, can they?
I mean, if they don’t believe in the Magic Kitchen Fairy, then they must be leaving those messes for me to clean up. And that can’t be right, can it?
We have a Magic Kitchen Fairy.
Master of Something I'm Yet To Discover 
The Kitchen Fairy has just called a universal strike. Now see what happens.😇🧚♂️
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Worked out well for the coal miners…. Tram conductors….
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My son had a ‘Magic Bedroom Fairy’. He couldn’t understand how untidy he became when he began living on red at Uni. 😂
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I think we had one of those in the early days but by the time we reached three school aged boys, she’d retired in exhaustion.
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^ on res
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What will happen if you DON’T clean it up ?
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I’m not sure. I’ve never been strong enough to wait her out for long.
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Do some strength studies, H me auld love. XO
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Ants…or perhaps worse.
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Yes, there’s that.
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But they oughta ring SOME kind of bell, surely ?
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I’m tempted to print this out and post it in our kitchen at work. I guess my coworkers thing their MKF follows them to the office.
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Reckon the Fairy Union has cleared them for Outside The Home work?
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Trying to take over the world, I suspect.
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The Magic Kitchen Fairy must be friends with Mr Nobody who used to live in my house when the children were around. “Who broke this mug?” I would enquire. “Not me” “Not me” “Not me” “Not me” (I have four children). “Must be Mr Nobody again” I’d reply. Don’t worry, you’ll miss all that cleaning up when they have all left home. Oh, hang on a minute. You did say your HUSBAND also believes?
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I think we may have had a couple of visits from Mr Nobody. He was usually responsible for eating chocolate.
Oh yes. I’m hoping our Magic Kitchen Fairy has terrible superannuation. I need her not to retire.
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Mr. Nobody
By Anonymous
I know a funny little man,
As quiet as a mouse,
Who does the mischief that is done
In everybody’s house!
There’s no one ever sees his face,
And yet we all agree
That every plate we break was cracked
By Mr. Nobody.
’Tis he who always tears out books,
Who leaves the door ajar,
He pulls the buttons from our shirts,
And scatters pins afar;
That squeaking door will always squeak,
For prithee, don’t you see,
We leave the oiling to be done
By Mr. Nobody.
He puts damp wood upon the fire
That kettles cannot boil;
His are the feet that bring in mud,
And all the carpets soil.
The papers always are mislaid;
Who had them last, but he?
There’s no one tosses them about
But Mr. Nobody.
The finger marks upon the door
By none of us are made;
We never leave the blinds unclosed,
To let the curtains fade.
The ink we never spill; the boots
That lying round you see
Are not our boots,—they all belong
To Mr. Nobody.
Source: The Golden Book of Poetry (1947)
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Haha… very good.
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Our MKF went on strike a couple of years ago. It was hell for me, but eventually a new agreement was reached. She still does “work to rule” every now and then just to remind the Y chromosomes how much they need her. Yours might try it — especially now you have your fab she-shed.
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I think I might have to have a chat with the MKF. Come to some sort of arrangement. Thanks for the tip!
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Have to admit; it is probably easier for me with only two y-‘s to contend with — and one is now living with his girlfriend 👍👍
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They can be so thoughtless, can’t they? My son is quite efficient in his own place (shared with girlfriend, who cracks the whip when it comes to chores…. gently 🙂 ). But Jude is right, you do miss them. Just not the cleaning up.
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If I ever miss cleaning up, it’s time to check me into the dementia unit.
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May I join you? Or at least visit 🙂 🙂
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Sure. Let’s create chaos together. 😊
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She must have sisters all around the world. Ours isn’t quite so active these days now it’s only the two of us. I wonder if she is related to the Empty Toilet Roll fairy. We need one of those at my workplace. 🙂
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In my experience, even when you do get an Empty Toilet Roll Fairy, they’ve had inadequate training on how to hang the roll the right way.
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Perhaps we need to start up a Fairy Academy, where they receive training in how to do these things correctly!
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Reminded me of this YouTube called The Mystery of the Basket: https://youtu.be/SqQgDwA0BNU
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Yes, another friend shared this with me. Living in a house full of males I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. 😂😭
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Sounds like the bread crumb wars may have a new chapter? Perhaps magic kitchen fairy need s to have a vacation. Xo
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I think all mothers and homemakers are magic kitchen and household fairies.
At least that is what our families expect us to be.
This post is an age old gripe presented in such a fun and original way.
I look forward to reading more of your work.
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Thank you for stopping by! Yes, I knew it was a topic that many would read and nod their heads in a ‘yep, been there, done that’ fashion. I think I’d just had to say one time too many “Are you going to wipe that up or are you expecting the Magic Kitchen Fairy to do it?” and it was time to release all those thoughts out into the world. Plus it was a fun thing to draw. 🙂
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Have you seen this video? Same type of thing: https://youtu.be/-_kXIGvB1uU
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Ooops, looking at other comments I guess i wasn’t original and putting that on… Oh well. It was a funny post! (I do my own cleaning, laundry, etc. Perhaps the only male in the world that does 😉 )
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😊 I wouldn’t have said anything. Just thank you.
You’re not the only one. I was lucky enough to marry one.
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Well, actually, I realise that last comment flies in the face of my post. But he does do laundry and ironing and vacuuming and mopping and clean bathrooms. The kitchen is his blind spot. But he does do dishes. 😊 (It’s mostly the younger males in the house who seem oblivious to everything.)
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Yes, ‘m sure younger males are more of a problem. And I can’t guarantee that I wasn’t a problem when I was younger 😉
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