Am I a good person?
Do you ever ask yourself that?
I ask it a lot. It’s something of a tenet, a measure, a check and a balance to my life.
Am I a good person?
How do you measure if you’re a good person?
For me, it’s always been about how I treat others and, more importantly, what I do for others.* Born into a family ‘blessed’ with an overactive servant gene, it has always filled my soul to be helpful to someone.
I’m not sure but I think somehow my servant gene has mutated into a selfish gene.
There are significant people in my life who require my help but I can’t seem to muster the willpower to do it.
There are tasks I have willingly undertaken for years for someone about whom I care very much that lately I have found a chore.
I take forever to answer emails requesting assistance for some task or other (if I answer at all).
Issues of justice for which I used to advocate passionately all just seem too hard now.
Friends regularly chide me (gently) for not being in touch for months on end.
When it comes to the blogosphere, I’ve been binge-watching shows on Netflix when I know I could be reading the blog posts of people who so kindly read mine.
Is there such a thing as a selfish good person?
Even when I try to be a good person, I can end up in a no-win situation. A genuine offer of assistance to a friend has become meaningless as I find myself regularly unavailable on the day required because I want to do what is best for a special group of children. Being good to the one means being selfish to the other.
Maybe it’s too hard to be a good person.
Or maybe we just have to be as good as it’s possible to be under the circumstances. A ‘good enough’ person.
And then we hope the circumstances change to allow us to be the person we really want to be.
What makes a good person to you?
*Consequently, should I do something against this tenet and do or say something that causes hurt to another, I never really get over it.