I’m a Jack of All Trades (in case you’re new to this blog and didn’t read my tagline). In a recent post in which I was evaluating the benefits or otherwise of being not very good at lots of things versus being spectacularly talented at one thing, fellow blogger and wise Canadian Maggie Wilson made the following astoundingly astute comment:
“Here’s something to consider: it’s the end of days… the zombies are just over the hill… who would you rather have on your team? – someone who rocked them at the opera house, or someone who knows a bit about just about anything needed to deal with the crisis.”
This has become my new mantra. Every random whim new important skill I feel called to pursue now has noble reasons behind it. So even though I haven’t yet learned to play that banjo I bought last year, I really must now have a ukulele because I am preparing for the Zombie Apocalypse. “How is that going to help?” Oh, well, I’m not sure right now but I know by the time the hordes are advancing I’ll have worked that out. Truly.
The zombies returned to the discussion in my last post but when I tried to talk to Maggie about it, she was momentarily distracted by the mention of brownies by the talented bikerchick57. This gave me the idea that maybe brownies could be a good way to distract zombies.
So Chef Me decided to have a crack at making Anti-Zombie Brownies today. (If you’re new here, you’ll soon get to know the many Mes that make up a Jack of All Trades. I can introduce you to quite a few here.)
I went with the theory that maybe if the brownie looked like a bit of brain, you could distract the zombie long enough to get away. Like throwing a piece of meat to a rampaging lion, right?
Of course, the resident Pedant (clearly more versed in zombie lore than I) pointed out that if I was going to call them Anti-Zombie Brownies then they should affect one of their weaknesses such as containing massive quantities of salt or somehow making the zombie catch on fire. Okay, so they’re more like Distract-The-Zombie Brownies.
Now, please bear in mind that I am a Jack of All Trades and therefore a Master of None (yet) so don’t expect the wow factor. (Also, there is no Photographer Me.)
Here’s the finished product:
Maggie offered to be taste tester which I thought was quite sacrificial of her – offering to taste something cooked by a Jack of All Trades is a deed worthy of an award for bravery. Probably she is now grateful that she lives in the wrong a different hemisphere and is therefore not handy for taste-testing.
But someone has to check them for zombie suitability (also if they can double as food supply while waiting for the apocalypse*).
Now, where are those boys of mine??
*Do you have a word that no matter how many times you write/type it, it takes about four tries to get it right? That’s mine.
Mine is ‘research’: I always type it, first time, as ‘reserach’. I have given up on what North Americans reckon are things called ‘brownies’: I reckon I’ve seen roughly eight different-looking versions. [grin]
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Yes, well, these are more pinkies than brownies. Ooh. What about ‘brainies’?
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There y’ go … 😀
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Love it! Those brains er brownies definitely look like zombie bait er zombie repellant
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Where’s the recipe? The sample? I must prepare for the apocolypse!
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Oh. A Jack of All Trades doesn’t record recipes. We make it up as we go and don’t write anything down in case it doesn’t work (so there’s no incriminating evidence of the disaster). Of course, it does mean that we can rarely repeat a success. Which is why we move on to something new.
I could send you a sample but by the time it got to you it really would only be suitable for zombies.
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Hey! I cook like that…no recipe, just throw stuff together and then don’t remember what I did two days later. Makes life interesting, right? Well, OK, I suppose I’ll have to bake my own zombie brownies. Life is so hard.
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It’s just slightly annoying when the kids say “That was really yum” and I can’t for the life of me remember what I did.
I promise, if I hear of the hordes advancing in your neck of the woods, I’ll FedEx some ‘brainies’ over to you. 😀
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Thanks, I appreciate your thoughtfulness. And thanks for the link to my blog. I appreciate that thoughtfulness as well. 🙂
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Haha, I hope to hear it satisfied their zombie appetite! 🙂
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It appeases, rather than satisfies. 🙂
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That’s a good excuse!
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Isn’t it? I love it. I’m going to play on that one for years! Thanks for visiting. 🙂
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Distract-the-Zombie Brownies? Hah! Love that. Also quite impressed that we have now added the Zombie Distractor/Zombie Slayer You to your list! Very creative post. You are just too impressive for words!
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Why, thank you! But (lowers voice) as a Jack of All Trades I’m not actually sure how my skill level is going to pan out in a life and death situation. But let’s just keep that between us, okay?
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……(pulls collar up around neck, slyly looks from side to side checking for zombies, and winks….) Yes, faking them out is definitely the plan to follow! Zombie distracting snacks, phase one!
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😎
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MMMMMMM…..brownies!!! ❤
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